Acknowledgments

This is the acknowledgments page for my ongoing book series, Sex Positivity versus Sex Coercion, or Gothic Communism (the one-page promo is where readers can learn about the entire book project; i.e.,  the abstract and summaries per volume, cover illustrations, project history and logo design).  This project has been ongoing since July 2022 and has over fifty models (fifteen of them muses, and many of them from the body of models I’ve drawn in the past before starting work on this book series); the acknowledgements page is made, simply enough, to acknowledge and thank them for their contributions. Also thanked are various artists who were paid to take part, as well as close friends, old professors, exes, and content creators (mainly on YouTube, but also elsewhere on, including the music, videogame and film industries).

Permissions: Any publicly available images are exhibited for purposes of education, transformation and critique, thus fall under Fair Use; private nude material and collabs with models are specifically shared with permission from the original owner(s). For more details about artist permissions, refer to the book disclaimer attached to each series of my blog-style book promotion; i.e., for my upcoming volumes; e.g., “Brace for Impact,” “Searching for Secrets,” and “Deal with the Devil.” 

Concerning Buggy Images: Sometimes the images on my site don’t always load and you get a little white-and-green placeholder symbol, instead. Sometimes I use a plugin for loading multiple images in one spot, called Envira Gallery, and not all of the images will load (resulting in blank white squares you can still right-click on). I‘ve optimized most of the images on my site, so I think it’s a server issue? Not sure. You should still be able to access the unloaded image by clicking on the placeholder/right-clicking on the white square (sometimes you have to delete the “?ssl=1” bit at the end of the url). 

Acknowledgments

“I don’t know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.” 

—J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring (1954)

(artist: Joseph Severn)

The British Romantic, John Keats, once described William Wordsworth’s poetry as indicative of the “egotistical sublime”; i.e., pertaining to an isolated genius whose self-centered nature makes the truth of their work self-evident. In reality, Wordsworth’s poems were based on the diary of his less-famous and -celebrated sister, Dorothy, whose meticulous chronicling of their various “wanders“ (1798) laid the foundation for her brother’s Romantic canon. As Gavin Andre Sukhu writes on the subject in 2013,

When reading the Grasmere Journal in conjunction with the poetry of William Wordsworth, Dorothy’s journal appears to be a set of notes written especially for him by her. As a matter of fact, Dorothy made it quite clear in the beginning of her journals that she was writing them for William’s “pleasure” (source).

Simply put, Keats was wrong. Wordsworth could not have written his famous poetry without his sister, whose close friendship and watchful eye he greatly cherished.

Like Wordsworth’s poems, Sex Positivity could not have been written alone; I needed the help of various friends, associates, and enemies. While I arguably wouldn’t be a Marxist without the eye-opening abuse of neoliberal Capitalism, I also wouldn’t be openly trans without the many lovers and friends who taught me the value of things beyond Capitalism (“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world…”). It is the latter group—those friends who stood by my side and didn’t abuse me—that I wish to honor.

Special thanks, then, to those people. Not only did their knowledge, bravery, generosity and love make this book possible in its current form; they made it fun, too. Yet, as I am blessed to have many different kinds of friends, I’ll thank each in turn. Please excuse my lists and organizing; I just like to be thorough and complete in my thanksgivings!

First, to my seventeen muses—Casper Clock, Crow, Sinead, Bay, Mugiwara Art, Harmony Corrupted, Romantic Rose, Angel Witch, Mercedes the Muse, Krispy Tofuuu, Ms. Reefer & Ayla, Quinnvincible, Blxxd Bunny, Nyx, Maybel & Jackie, and Itzel: You’ve all lent me tremendous emotional support and helped me through some really hard times. Your solidarity during our combined struggle helped make this book possible. To each of you, I wanted to give an extra-special thank you:

  • To Bay: Thank you for your invaluable contributions to Sex Positivity, puppy, and for being such a wonderful partner. Meeting you so late into the book’s construction was incredibly serendipitous, but also fortunate in that you gave excellent daily feedback, provided many interesting (and germane) ideas to explore, and just frankly inspired and motivated me in so many different ways that, combined, transformed and expanded the landscape of this book more than anyone else (who all, I should add, pitched in a great amount). For example, from the date that we met (June 14th, 2023) until the altering of this entry (July 19th) you inspired me to create over fifty new, collage-style exhibits (about 25% of my book’s total exhibits up to this point); on top of that, from July 24th to August 16th, the book increased another 150 pages, gaining an additional 88,000 words and 123 new images (many of which were exhibits). You’re a person of great mana—incredibly loving and sweet, but also gorgeous, cultured and diverse in your many interests and passions; our minds also think very much alike and I absolutely love it and adore you for it while having weaved your contributions into this book like a tapestry with your assistance. I cannot imagine this project (or my life) without you in it, injecting into both things of yourself that have changed how I see the world in ways I cannot imagine being different or without. I love you so very, very much, muffin, and am glad to have met you the way that we did!

(artist: Angel Witch)

  • To Angel Witch: Thank you for being so much fun to work with, cutie, and all around just a very nice person and beautiful friend! You’re absolutely gorgeous and incredibly sweet—someone who’s very good about communicating their boundaries while respecting mine, and I feel proud to include you in my book!
  • To Sinead: Thank you, fae, for being an excellent communicator, teacher and friend. Your careful, nuanced instruction has helped me grasp and maintain the nuances of fat positivity versus fat liberation, and I feel the project has only benefited from your targeted, informative contributions (and zine suggestions). Also thank you for appreciating my work, embodying it through the example that you clearly set for yourself and effortlessly lead by! You’re incredibly fun to talk to but also work/play with, and your ample, flawless body is the very stuff that dreams are made of!
  • To Crow: Thank you, puppy, for being such a game and receptive collaborator, and for treating me as well as you do; you’re a wonderful partner—gorgeous, delightful, and sweet—and spending time with you has been so, so much fun! You’ve given me so much to enjoy and look forward to: making someone I love feel good. It delights me that I’ve found a sweetie who I can pour my boundless love (and cum) into. So all the kisses and snuggles, baby!
  • To Mercedes: Thank you, mommy, for inspiring my work. It meant so much when you first approached me and asked to be drawn, as I’d never had an artist/model do that before. But I absolutely love and respect what you stand for and think that you’re incredibly legitimate, hot and valid. Thank you for being you!
  • To Itzel: Thank you, daddy, for making me feel so pretty and special, but also offering me guidance and protection—like the little princess I always to be!
  • To Bunny: Thank you, bun-bun, for your financial support and monumental kindness as a friend, but also offering as much reference material as you did—i.e., the collaborative shoots whose images grace the front and back covers of this book, but also your impressive galleries to inspire the illustrations on its inner pages. Know that the additional exhibits based on your excellent OF shoots inspired many artworks by me, a commission by someone else, and multiple write-ups.

(artist: Krispy Tofuuu)

  • To Krispy and Quinn: You are both incredibly gorgeous and friendly to work with—treating me like a person and an equal, first and foremost. That means so, so much!
  • To Casper Clock: Thank you, Casper—for having such an amazing ass and work ethic, and for just being all-around so wonderful to work with! You’re the best!
  • To Mugiwara Art: Thank you, Mugi, for being so fun to play with and talk to, and for working together despite some initial confusions (and for helping me address them as well as you did). Thank you as well, then, for teaching me about plural people and for giving me a chance to represent them more in my work (re: sex-positive demons).
  • To Harmony Corrupted: Thank you, mommy, for being so fun to talk to deeply about different complicated subjects and expressing a continued interest in my work (which led to an entire module[!] for Volume Two, doubling it in size), but also for being so easy to work and play with. You’re amazing in bed, have the world’s best ass (so peachy and fuckable), and are fascinating to talk to. I love watching your SO fuck you with his big dick, and am grateful for him being so kind to you. I feel like you’re a dark spirit, overall; i.e., different, but alluring and sweet inside your beautiful darkness. Also, while we have a lot of common interests, you’re also very nice and good about communicating (in and out of bed). I really value that!
  • To Chryssi (Ms. Reefer) & Ayla: Thank you both for being so wonderful to work with. You were my first AMAB couple (which, as a trans woman, I really appreciate), and playing and working with you both has been so much fun! To Chryssi, in particular—thank you, mommy, for being so good in bed; both of you are wonderful people and it was an absolute pleasure meeting you both, but you make my girl cock feel amazing! To Ayla—thank you for fucking Chryssi so nicely with your huge dick! You’re both adorable!
  • To Rose: Thank you for communicating so quickly and well, but also for producing such lovely content on short notice. You’re absolutely gorgeous and working with you was an absolute treat!

(artist: Nyx)

  • To Nyx: Thank you for inspiring this project, comrade! Your close bond with nature, back in West Virginia, is inspiring (“Mountain Mama, take me home!”), as is your amazing body (having the best ass and thighs ever) and giant heart! Working with you inspired me to come out as trans, and go on to write and illustrate Sex Positivity (six books, nearly two million words, hundreds of exhibits and collages, over a hundred unique illustrations by me, thousands of images total, and dozens of collaborations with illustrators and sex workers of all walks). Bless you, mommy!
  • To Maybel & Jackie: Thank you both for producing such excellent content, and Maybel in particular for being so sweet and supportive. You’re both awesome!

Moreover, all seventeen of you treated me like I had genuine value—that I wasn’t “just” an artist whose work was “free” during our exchanges. That means the world, really. I will cherish your priceless contributions and immeasurable kindness beyond words. From the bottom of my heart, thank you, babes!

Second, to my long-time friends and associates and diamonds in the rough:

(artist: Persephone van der Waard, of Ginger. Originally illustrated to celebrate their coming out as trans, but revised in a more devilish form for this book.)

  • To Ginger, first and foremost: My best friend—who’s been there for me more times than I can count—thank you from the bottom of my heart; more than anyone else, your deep support, crucial humor and endless hours talking together about shared ideas, struggles and solutions have been foundational—about sex positivity as a virtue have been essential to shaping the writing inside these pages. Thank you, for saving me from Jadis and other abusers who either meant me harm or otherwise took advantage; and for teaching me about figure drawing, including but not limited to: drawing boobs and faces, but rib cages and pelvises. You are a saint, as fierce as a dragon in a pinch, and a most excellent hobbit all-around; may the hair on your toes never fall out; may the rest of your days be plentiful, memorable and comfortable!
  • To Fen: For teaching me about animals, empathizing with them, and how to draw their floofy tails, but also for being there for me in a crucial moment. Like Ginger, you saved me from Jadis and for that, I will always be grateful. But you’re also incredibly chill and fun to spend time with and I appreciate that greatly. Never change, my friend.
  • To Lydia: A mega-special thank you for your friendship over the years (over ten at this point) and for your own special help with this project. While you were less direct in your overall engagement with the manuscript, your contributions still made a difference. For one, you were someone I felt comfortable coming out to, who—when I realized for myself that I was trans—was able to drip-feed it to you. And when I finally said, “I probably seem different to you now,” you replied that I was the third person who told you that: “No, you seem exactly the same; you seem different to yourself.” As it turns out, you explained that I wasn’t the first; I was third out of three people who came out to you (and as you said to another person who came out to you, to which you added, “You don’t have to feel bad about it or like I wouldn’t want to talk to you anymore. True be told, as the sole girl in a classful of boys, it kind of made me want to talk to you even more!”). Likewise, our conversations about horror, science fiction and fantasy are something I always enjoy and draw inspiration from, spiced by your endless grit and “give zero fucks” sense of humor. Thank you, my friend.
  • To Odie: Thank you for generously supporting my work over the years and for always asking me to draw unique, interesting and diverse things! You’ve made a huge difference in my life and I appreciate your patronage and friendship very much!
  • To Drs. Craig Dionne, Bernard Miller, Xavi Reyes, Paul Wake, Sam Hirst, Dale Townshend, Eric Acton, and David Calonne: Thank you for staying in touch over the years and giving me feedback, encouragement and ideas. To Craig, in particular—I wouldn’t have pushed so hard to go to grad school if not for your initial glowing praise and support. Thank you for that! And to the rest of the Humanities faculty at EMU and MMU I haven’t mentioned by name—I enjoyed all of your classes and the opportunity to absorb and learn from what you had to offer!
  • To Dr. Sorcha Ní Fhlainn: Thank you for recommending The Monstrous-Feminine to me at MMU; it inspired me a lot in writing this book!
  • To Dr. Sandy Norton: Thank you for lending me tremendous emotional/material support and kindness in the most trying of times. You always encouraged me to write, too, and valued my “great heart.” Per your instructions, I’ve poured as much of it as I could into this book—to better help those in need (also, thank you for your 1968 copy of The Pearl: A Journal of Facetive and Voluptuous Reading (1968). It’s everything I wished Austen had been and provided a much-needed “other side of the coin” to consider when writing my own book about such matters).

(artist: Angel)

  • To Angel: Thank you for being a really wonderful friend and for showing me a lot of cool things to include in Sex Positivity that I wouldn’t have otherwise! Meeting you was a delight I can scarce express and working with you—on my art, or helping you with yours—has been an absolute treat.
  • To my good friend, Seren: You were, are, and always will be best girl. Not only have you always had my back, but your dress sense is impeccable and your sweet kindness knows no bounds (also, you have great taste in literature and in horror). Thank you for being so understanding and wonderful, babydoll. Kisses and hugs galore!

Of course, the painful knowledge of my enemies also went into the melting pot—i.e., older abusive lovers, which include the likes of Zeuhl, Jadis, and Cuwu. While I am leery of giving too much credit, I do have some thoughts to impart to these individuals:

  • To Zeuhl: My scarecrow. A small part of me will always miss you the most—for being one of the most interesting and cool people I’ve ever met—yet also recognizes how, seemingly on a whim, you selfishly hurt me worse than anyone else (and offered the most brainless explanation imaginable); no bullshit, you did some really fucked up stuff and basically turned into a shadow of your former self, but I’ll still cherish the love we shared, overseas. It was fun while it lasted!
  • To Jadis: My tinman and wicked witch. Though you hurt me badly, I still learned a great deal from you and your beautiful wickedness. I have no desire to see you again, though, and write this message as a final parting gift: I wrote Sex Positivity to heal from what you did; your heartless abuse was my dragon to slay and now I have. After countless nights of terror spent under your thrall, I can safely say with joy and pride, “You have no power over me!”
  • And to Cuwu: My cowardly lion. Our friendship may have been brief, and you were pretty shitty and callow towards the end, but it was still hella saucy and helped pushed me to come out as trans and write this book (which contains many Marxist terms/colloquialisms that I learned personally from you); also thank you for lending me your copy of A History of the World in Seven Cheap Things and for introducing me to SpongeBob. It really was a good show.

(artist: Ronin Dude)

Special thanks to all of the other models involved; their efforts breathed tremendous beauty, inspiration and meaning into my work. To Dani—thank you for modeling specifically for this project on short notice and for generally being cool and sweet! Meowing from Hell, thank you for the abundance of reference material early on and for sharing my work as much as you did; it made a giant difference (even if you ultimately disagreed with my politics/identity and treated me fairly poorly because of it)! Emma, thank you for keeping my spirits (and other things) up during this book’s creation!

Thank you to other collaborators as well, whose contributions were absolutely vital: Tana the Puppy, Bovine Harlot, Candy Prince Forte, Venusinaries, Eldritch Babe, Roxie Rusalka, Drooling Red, Autumn Anarchy, Ashley Yelhsa, UrEvilMommy, Keighla Night, Scarlet Love, Jazminskyyy, Cedar, Bubi, Lil Miss Puff, XCumBaby98, Mischievous Kat, Nyx, Soon2Bsalty, Lovely Babe 2017, Mikki Storm, Mei Minato, Red’s References, Dulci, Angel Witch, Jericho, Lady Nyxx, Miss Nia Sax, Annabel Morningstar, Coffin Milf, Ebonnyy, Scoobsboobs and Miss Misery. I wrote it for all of you, but also every sex worker/cutie I’ve drawn over the years. In hard times, know that you’re all special, valid people; that your signature kindness, warm personalities, and stunning bodies enrich the world!

Special thanks to the artists (other than Odie) who agreed to be commissioned for the book: Lucid-01, Adagadegelo, Autumn Anarchy, Marlon Trelie, Jim32, and Dcoda.

Special thanks to the ace and/or neurodivergent people in my life, whose constant feedback and support has proven invaluable!

Special thanks to my mother—for never having an English dictionary in the house, and for giving me a room of one’s own to complete my work. This book wouldn’t exist without the sanctuary and means you provided to see it through.

I’d also like to thank the content creators on YouTube whose political discourse and general content not only proved incredibly helpful in writing this book: Theremin Trees, Rebecca Watson, Essence of Thought, Sheep in the Box, J. Aubery, Jessie Gender, Professor Lando, Three Arrows, Schafer Scott, Xevaris, Rhetoric & Discourse, Satenmadpun, The Majority Report, Hasan Piker, Fascinating Horror, YUGOPNIK, Broey Deschanel, Joon the King, Macabre Storytelling, Sisyphus 55, John the Duncan, Noah Samsen, Bad Empanada, The Living Philosophy, Heckin’ Steve, Ashley Gavin, Spikima Movies, MarshSMT, Behind the Bastards, Genetically Modified Skeptic, Eldena Doubleca5t, STRANGE ÆONS, F.D. Signifier, Hakim, Non Compete, Moonic Productions, Another Slice, Atun-Shei Films, Kay and Skittles, Second Thought, blameitonjorge, Georg Rockall-Schmidt, D’Angello Wallace, Thought Slime, Dreading, Caelan Conrad, Little Hoots, Tirrrb, Skip Intro, Anansi’s Library, GDF, (fellow Dutch person) Brows Held High, and Renegade Cut. Even you centrists, broken clocks and chudwads: Turkey Tom, penguinz0, Knowing Better, The People Profiles, More Plates More Dates, and Collative Learning. Thank you all for your wonderful video essays, political commentaries, and documentaries!

Thank you to Karl Jobst (for your good detective work, not your racism or pick-up artistry), Bismuth, Summoning Salt, and the other members of the YouTube speedrunner documentarian community for making such well-researched content; it contributed to my own graduate work and towards this book. Thanks as well to Jeremy Parish and Scott Sharkey for their research into Metroidvania (even if they hate the term now), and for Jeremy Parish’s books on Metroid (e.g., The Anatomy of Metroid, 2014) but also on the subject of videogames in general; they were fun reads!

Thanks to the various content creators, actors, speedrunners, and streamers I’ve interviewed over the years for my various interview series, whose reflections have helped me rethink what the Gothic even is. Without your contributions, this book as it currently exists would not be possible:

Kailey (to the left) and Sam (to the right) on-set (courtesy of Greg Massie)

Thanks to Boss Ross, Frank Frazetta, Zdzisław Beksinski, Stephen Gemmell, and Ridley Scott (and associate artists; e.g., Mobius, Giger and Cobb, etc) for having a profound and lasting influence on my artwork, imagination and life. Some of you haunted my childhood; others came later and blew my mind. But you’re all rockstars.

Lastly, thank you to the many, many other artists hitherto unmentioned whose work is featured all throughout Sex Positivity. Some of you are recent discoveries, be they models from the present or masters from the past. However, I have followed and studied some of you for many years, and now feel very differently than I did once upon a time! For example, I can see the sexist, racist and otherwise xenophobic/fascist undertones in Frazetta. All the same, his canon is still worthy of dialectical-material study—to learn from the past and appreciate the sex-positive lessons in his work, however imperfect! May they shape the world into something better.

Thank you all very much for reading! Be brave and don’t be afraid to learn! Nazi pigs and neoliberals, fuck off.

—Persephone van der Waard

(artist: Persephone van der Waard)